Trail Conditions: Wait..

Weather: 40 and Cloudy.

40 with a chance of light rain tonight. But after that things look a little promising. If we get a light rain and then temps fall below freezing like the forecast says it will harden up our base. With snow coming in behind that it may be the Christmas present we are all hoping for. Stay tuned Sled Heads, the Season may just begin the day after Christmas after all.

I picked up a hitch-hiker.   Seemed like a nice guy.
After a few miles he asked me if I wasn’t afraid he
might be a serial killer?
I told him the odds of two serial killers being in the
same car was extremely unlikely.
I think he wet his pants

 

Trail Conditions: Wait..

Weather: 39 and Sunny

Curve ball after curve ball, that is what Mother Nature is throwing at us. Best to stay off the trails for now I think you will be doing more harm than good. It looks like 1 more day before temps head back down and snow is in the forecast. Sit and wait for now, it will come.

Testicle disorder

A wealthy hospital benefactor was being shown around the hospital.

During her tour, she passed a room where a male patient was masturbating furiously.

“Oh my GOD!” screamed the woman. “That’s disgraceful! Why is he doing that?”

The doctor who was leading the tour calmly explained,

“I’m very sorry that you were exposed to that, but this man has a serious condition where his testicles rapidly fill with semen, and if he doesn’t ejaculate at least five times a day, he’ll be in extreme pain and his testicles could easily rupture.”

“Oh, well in that case, I guess it’s okay,” said the woman…

As they passed by the next room, they saw a male patient laying in bed while a nurse performed oral sex on him.

Again, the woman screamed, “Oh my GOD!  How can THAT be justified?”

Again the doctor spoke very calmly: “Same illness, better health plan. “

Where’s the snow?

Trail Conditions: OK to poor to bad sections..

Weather: Mild

I didn’t have much contact with riders this weekend. Nobody stopped in Dutches Bar and only one group at the Lodge last night. The groups from the Lodge, Stan and Ollie I think their names were, said they rode 550 miles and it was pretty good considering the temps. The last snow we had was pretty wet and I think it also says the groomers being out early to set up the base did a hell of a job. Now only if Mother Nature will turn down the temp and send us some snow we will be good to go. Forecast looks promising for after Christmas.

A blonde liberal was sitting in class when the professor asked her if sheknew what the Rowe vs. Wade decision was.

 She sat there for quite a while pondering this very profound question and finally sighed and said, “I think that is the decision George Washington made prior to crossing the Delaware.

 

Trail Conditions: OK to poor to bad sections..

Weather: Mild

Bears Packer game at Gogebic Lodge today. Party time.

Temps cooling off tomorrow and chance of snow later in the week. Fingers crossed that Mother Nature will do the right thing.

A weasle walks into a bar and the bar tender says in all my life I’ve never seen a weasle in bar. What can I get for you? Pop, goes the weasle.

Trail Conditions: OK to poor to bad sections..

Weather: Mild

Expect good trail conditions to dwindle as temps and sun continue to not cooperate with our weather wishes. Mother Nature must have PMS this week. Next week looks a little better with highs going back down below the freeze line. Some chance of snow later in the week. I don’t think up north is in any better shape than us either. The weather will turn, hopefully next week.

Mom is doing a lot better, probably coming home from the hospital on Monday.

 

Beautiful weather unless you are a snowmobiler.

Trail Conditions: OK to poor to bad sections..

Weather: Mild

OK Mother Nature, enough with the mild weather. 40’s this weekend. Not good, conditions will only deteriorate with temps, sun and riders. You been warned so don’t come up here and then bitch. Looks better for next weekend but only time will tell.

The Great Lao-Tzu said:  “It is only when you see a mosquito landing on your testicles that you realize there is always a way to solve problems without using violence.

Mild Temps.

Trail Conditions: OK to poor to bad sections..

Weather: Mild

Temps are not cooperating with us up here. Looks a little better towards Christmas though. Our wet areas need to freeze down and the lake needs more ice on it. Sleds are around and decent riding can be found, my suggestion is ask other rides when you see them. Sorry but for right now that is the best I can do, I’m not in touch with too many sledders at this time. If you do come up please feel free to post your experiences on my Facebook site.

I’ve been a little slow returning emails and phone calls, been bust with Mom, she is in the hospital right now and I am spread a little thin. But email or call and I will answer as soon as I can.

  The Golfer

A golfer hits his ball into a yard next to the golf course.

As he goes to get it a man in the yard says, “Don’t you see
the sign? It says, ‘Private property – Stay Out!'”

The golfer says, “I’m sorry I did not see it. That’s my
ball over there. May I have it, please?”

The man says, “It’s in my yard and so it’s my ball now.”

The golfer looks at the man and says, “I think I understand”

He then walks back to the golf cart, gets another golf ball,
then walks back and throws it into the yard as well.

The man says, “What did you do that for?”

The golfer replies,

“I consider myself a Gentleman, and I
believe every prick should have two balls.”

No major Changes.

Trail Conditions: OK to poor to no good.

Weather: Mild

Chance of some snow the next few days but warmer for the weekend. What seemed like a good start is turning into an OK or so-so start. Yea I’m reaching for something to write. With milder temps wet areas are not going to freeze. Conditions are going to be all over the place. Save your trip for a bit later. We need cold.

Celibacy

 

What is Celibacy?

 

Celibacy can be a choice in life, or a condition imposed by circumstances.

 

While attending a Marriage Weekend, Frank and his wife Carol listened to the instructor declare, “It is essential that husbands and wives know the things that are important to each other.”

 

He then addressed the men.

 

“Can you name and describe your wife’s favorite flower?”

 

Frank leaned over, touched Carol’s arm gently, and whispered,
“General Mills All-Purpose, isn’t it?”

 

And thus began Frank’s life of celibacy.

Baby It’s Cold Outside, I wish.

High temps are 30 these days. Not what we need but I have seen a lot worse starts to the season. Be patient, it will get better. I only had 2 riders at the Lodge yesterday. I do believe if they knew how thick the ice is on the main lake  I would not have had any riders. They headed south on the trail when they left.

Nothing else to report, check out my facebook page to see pics Snowmobile Clubs are posting on problem areas.

Early Season Riding.

I worked in Marenisco last night. Kind of quiet, had a few locals in on sleds but no groups. There is slush on the Lake where riders are getting on and off, people are riding it but I would not. I have seen pics of ugly water holes in places out on the trails too. Forecast for the next week or so is below freezing but there are a few days with temps hitting low 30’s for highs. If you do come up to ride this week use caution. I’m at the Lodge today.

Coming Home Drunk…

Two married buddies are out drinking one night, when one turns to the other and says, “You know, I don’t know what else to do.  Whenever I go home after we’ve been out drinking, I turn the headlights off before I get to the driveway.  I shut off the engine and coast into the garage.  Take my shoes off before I go into the house, I sneak up the stairs, get undressed in the bathroom, stick my foot in the toilet and pee down my leg to prevent splashing sounds.  I ease into bed and my wife STILL wakes up, and yells at me for staying out so late!”
His buddy looks at him and says “Well, you’re obviously taking the wrong approach!  I screech into the driveway, slam the door, storm up the steps, pee hard into the toilet water, then use the full flush, throw my shoes in the closet, undress in the bedroom, then jump into bed, slap her on the butt and say, “WHO’S HORNY?!”   And she acts like she’s sound asleep….