Don’t put them sleds away just yet. 8-12 inches coming our way later this week. So much for spring.

The mother-in-law arrives home from
> shopping to find her son-in-law, Paddy in a steaming rage
> and hurriedly packing his suitcase.  “What happened
> Paddy?” she asks
> anxiously.“What
> happened?  I’ll tell you what happened!  I
> sent an email to my wife telling her I was coming home today
> from my fishing trip.  I get home…  and guess
> what I found?  Your daughter, my wife, Jean, naked with
> Joe Murphy in our marital bed!  This is
> unforgivable!  The end of our marriage.  I’m
> done.  I’m leaving forever!”
> “Ah now,
> calm down, calm down Paddy!” says his mother-in-law.
> “There is something very odd going on here.  Jean
> would never do such a thing!  There must be a simple
> explanation.  I’ll go speak to her immediately and
> find out what happened.” Moments
> later, the mother-in-law comes back with a big smile.
> “Paddy, there, I told you it must be a simple explanation.
> She never
> got your email!”

Time to take tax the income tax info to the accountant. I bet you spent your return money already and I am just getting ready to get mine.

If you looked at the web cams yesterday you would have seen some crazy snow coming down. It looked like sleet only it was mini snowballs. Never seen that up here before. Anyways boring as hell up here right now. I hate this time of year. A few fishermen are still out on the lake but that is about all the action we see. Time to do get drunk I guess so I have something to write about.

Here is what we ended up with

 

A Briton, a Scot, and an Irish lad are drinking together one night.

After a while, the English bloke says: “I was cleaning my daughter’s room the other day and found a packet of fags. I was really shocked, as I hadn’t the faintest she’d been smoking.”

“Ach,” the Scotsman says. “That’s nothing. I was cleaning me own daughter’s room the other day when I can across a half-empty bottle o’ whiskey. I was really shocked as I had no idea she was drinking, and at her age!”

With that, the Irishman says “Both you lads haven’t a thing to worry about, next to me. Why, I was cleaning my daughter’s room the other day when I found a packet of condoms. And ye want to talk about being shocked! How was I to know she had a cock?”

Thunder and lightning today, tis the time of year.

Putting your affairs in order!
The doctor, after an examination, sighed and said, ‘I’ve got some bad news.  You have terminal cancer, and you’d best put your affairs in order.’

The woman was shocked, but managed to compose herself and walk into the waiting room where her daughter had been waiting.

‘Well, daughter, we women celebrate when things are good, and we celebrate when things don’t go so well. In this case, things aren’t well. I have terminal cancer. So, let’s head to the club and have a champagne.’

After 3 or 4 champagnes, the two were feeling a little less sombre.
There were some laughs and more champagnes.
They were eventually approached by some of the woman’s old friends, who were curious as to what the two were celebrating The woman told her friends they were drinking to her impending end, ‘I’ve been diagnosed with AIDS.’

The friends were aghast, gave the woman their condolences and beat a hasty retreat.

After the friends left, the woman’s daughter leaned over and whispered, ‘Mum, I thought you said you were dying of cancer, and you just told your friends you were dying of AIDS! Why did you do that?’

‘Because I don’t want any of those bitches sleeping with your father after I’m gone.’

And THAT, my friends, is what is called, ‘Putting Your Affairs In Order.’

I think it is safe to say it is over. Some of the clubs to the south and west kept groomin until late last week and riders said conditions were still pretty good for late season. But I think it is safe to say the trails are toast now. Thanks again for coming to see us. See you next year, where? Who the hell knows where I’ll end up.

He said She said:

1) She said… “What do you mean by coming home half drunk?”
He said… “It’s not my fault…I ran out of money.”

2) He said… “Since I first laid eyes on you, I’ve wanted to make love to
you in the worst way.”
She said… “Well, you succeeded.”

3) On wall in ladies room: “My husband follows
me everywhere.” Written just below it: “I do not.”

4) He said… “Shall we try a different position tonight?”
She said…”That’s a good idea…. you stand by the ironing board while I
sit on the sofa.”

5) Priest said… ‘I don’t think you will ever find another man like your
late husband.’
She said…’Who’s gonna bother looking?’

6) He said… “What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave
you?”
She said…”Turn sideways and look in the mirror.”

7) He said… “Let’s go out and have some fun tonight”.
She said… “Okay, but if you get home before I do, leave the hallway
light on.

A balmy 50 degrees today in beautiful downtown Merriweather today. The snow is melting and the creeks are running. Sad to see winter go.
A woman walks into an accountant’s office and tells him that she needs to file her taxes.
The accountant says, “before we begin, I’ll need to ask you a few questions.”
“He gets her name, address, Social security number, etc. and then asks, “Whats your occupation?”
“I’m a Lady of the night,” she says.
The accountant is somewhat taken aback and says, “Lets try to rephrase that.”
“The woman says, “Ok, I’m a high-end call girl.”
“No, that still won’t work. Try again.”
“They both think for a minute; then the woman says, “I’m an elite chicken farmer.”
The accountant asks, “What does chicken farming have to do with being a prostitute?”
“Well, I raised a thousand little peckers last year.
The accountant says, “Chicken farmer it is”!

Good morning from the UP. Well not much else interesting to say so here is a pretty good joke.

A professor travels to Africa to live with a primitive tribe and spends years with them, teaching them all about the wonders of science and mathematics.  He makes friends with the tribe’s chief and his wife and they all live happily for some time.  One day the chief’s wife gives birth to a white child.  The word spreads and the entire tribe is in shock.

The chief pulls the professor aside and says, “Look, you are the only white man we’ve ever seen around here, and my wife gave birth to a white child.  It doesn’t take a genius to figure out what happened!”

The professor replied, “No, chief, you’re mistaken.  What we have here is a natural occurrence what we in the civilized world call an albino!  Look at that field over there.  All the sheep are white except for one black one. Nature does this on occasion.”

The chief was silent for a moment, then said, “Tell you what.  You don’t say anything more about that sheep and I won’t say anything more about the white kid.”

The Fat Lady is Singing.

Trail Conditions: Going down Hill quick

Weather: Warming up.

We have been done grooming around the Lake Gogebic Area since the weekend I think. Too bad because we had some cold nights. We had a good season and I’m sure the area businesses want to thank each and everyone of you that visited our area.

I’ll try to update the website as often as I can send me a good joke if you get one.

A Story With A Moral!

Every year, Simon entered the state lottery hoping to win. He never did. Finally, he prayed vigorously, and hoping for God’s message, he walked around the fair.

A flash of lightning struck as he was passing by Suzie’s stall. She was bending over and he saw she was not wearing panties. He could see a 7 written on both her buns.

He bet on 77 as he thought God had given him a clue. He lost again…Sad!

The winning number was 707.

Moral of the story: Never underestimate the importance of assholes in your life.

Trail Conditions: Going down Hill quick

Weather: Warming up.

Things don’t look good in the Northwoods.   The Lake will probably not be rideable very soon if not already. It has been a good year for riders up here, with snow all over we didn’t have the traffic we usually have, leaving the trails in great condition most of the time. I hate to say it but I think the fat lady is getting to do a concert.

You’ll probably be able to find good conditions and clubs still grooming for a little while up towards Houghton but I would call someone first.

Becker was feeling a bit frisky the other day and I have not been up to the challenge so she spiked my coffee with 4 Viragra  which I od’d on. It was the hardest day of my life. But the good news is I have not fallen out of bed in days.