Snow day Today.

We have a few inches on the ground and it is snowing this morning. Ewen Trout Creek School already called off school today. When I was a kid we walked through 3 feet of snow uphill, Both ways. Oh wait maybe that was my dad. Forecast now is 5-8 inches, I went and bought a snow blower yesterday so that is why totals have dropped from 8-12 inches I think. Check out the web cams through out the day to see the real story.

It Was So Cold that

We had to stop eating with metal cutlery. Some people walked around for days with spoons or forks stuck to their tongues!

Hitchhikers were holding up pictures of thumbs!

Roosters were rushing into Kentucky Fried Chicken and begging to use the pressure cooker!

When I dialed 911, a recorded message said to phone back in the spring!

The optician was giving away free ice scrapers with every new pair of eyeglasses!

Kids were using a new excuse to stay up late: “But Mom, my pyjamas haven’t thawed out yet!”

Richard Simmons started wearing pants!

A streaker froze in mid-streak! The town council just stuck a plaque on him and pretended he was a Greek statue until spring.

UN weapons inspectors suddenly decided that chemical weapons might be hidden in Hawaii!

Pickpockets were sticking their hands in strangers’ pockets just to keep them warm!

The squirrels in the park were throwing themselves at an electric fence!

I chipped a tooth on my soup!

My Dad was wearing golfing gloves on both hands!

Starbucks was serving coffee on a stick!

People with traffic tickets would plead guilty and beg for the electric chair! Terrorists started to stockpile weapons-grade hot chocolate!

Levi Strauss started manufacturing electric jeans!

We had to chop up the piano for firewood – but we only got two chords.

When we milked the cows, we got ice cream! When we milked the brown cows – we got chocolate ice cream!

Snow is on the way.

November 8th and here it comes.  6-8 or 8-10 inches tomorrow. How sure am I we are going to get it? 110%. My plow truck is in the shop so we are going to get it for sure. Better start reserving your days for the coming season soon.

Winters are fierce in Minnesota where he lives, so the owner of a construction project felt he was doing a good deed when he bought earmuffs for his foreman. Noticing, however, that the foreman wasn’t wearing the earmuffs even on the coldest snowy day, the project manager asked, “Didn’t you like the muffs?” The Foreman said, “They’re a thing of beauty.” “Why don’t you wear them?” The Project Manager said. The Foreman explained, “I was wearing them the first day, and somebody offered to buy me lunch, but I didn’t hear him! Never again, never again!”

Elections are over.

I think something is wrong with my phone. It quit ringing, no political calls at all this morning. Snowing this morning, and more snow in the forecast the rest of the week. Temps are also going to stay below freezing so the snow will be here for a while.

Michigan passed the legalization of recreational marijuana law. Now they have to go to work and figure what to do to regulate it because it is still against federal law. Maybe they will legalize it in Washington so all the politicians can get a buzz and then sit down calmly and start working on things together. We can only hope I guess.

Ole and Sven were drinking buddies who worked as aircraft mechanics in Minneapolis and one day the airport was fogged in and they were stuck in the hangar with nothing to do.
Ole said, “I vish ve had somethin ta drink!”
Sven says, “Me too. Y’know, I hear ya can drink dat jet fuel and get a buzz. Ya vanna try it?”
So they pour themselves a couple of glasses of high octane hooch and got completely smashed.
Next morning Ole woke up and is surprised at how good he feels. In fact he feels GREAT! NO hangover! NO bad side effects. Nothing!
The phone rang. It was Sven who asks “How iss you feelin dis mornin?”
Ole says, “I feel great. How bout you?”
Sven says, “I feel great, too. Ya don’t have no hangover?”
Ole says, “No dat jet fuel iss great stuff — no hangover, nothin. Ve oughta do dis more often.”
Sven agreed.”Yeah, vell, but dere’s yust vun ting.”
Ole asked, “Vat’s dat?”
Sven questioned, “Haff you farted yet?”
Ole stopped to think. “No ”
“Vell, DON’T, ’cause I’m in Iowa.”

Taco Tuesday

I think I need me some Gogebic Lodge tacos. I hope Becker is in the mood. (For tacos that is). It is kind of ugly up here now, dark and gloomy, wet and damp and in the high 30’s. Oh but that is good hunting season weather. Glad I don’t hunt. May be some tacos, fire in the fireplace and a movie night.

Easy come easy go.

We had a nice little teaser snow yesterday, 3-4 inches probably. This morning it is all gone though. But hey, it helps in cooling off the lake and the ground. Now give us some cold weather first Mother Nature.

I got a call this morning for another rental on the Little House, the first snows usually bring on reservations. Call soon to get the dates you want

Snowy Sunday.

Yep 3-5 coming down as I write. Great time to have a screwed up plow truck. I’m working at Gogebic Lodge today so come by and watch the snow fall on Lake Gogebic with me.

Q: Why are polaris snowmobiles and babies alike.
A: They both love rattles.

Q: How do you get a polaris rider exited.
A: Tell them their sled is ready for pickup at the repair shop.

Q: Why did the ski doo burn its belt up.
A: From towing 7 polaris sleds at one time.

Q: How do you make a polaris go fast.
A: Tow it behind a ski doo.

Q. How Do You Make a Polaris rider happy?
A. slip an arctic cat or ski doo engine under his hood, and switch suspension from bogie wheels to some suspension that real men use!

Q:What do you call a polaris on a lake?
A: A summer submarine

Q: What do you call a polaris that runs.
A: A miracle

Q: Why do people buy polaris snowmobiles.
A: It gives them an excuse to stay in the house.

Q: What do you call a Polaris on the trail
A: An obstacle

Q:what do you call 100 polaris snowmobiles and owners stranded on the ice in march?
A: A reproduction of the titanic

Q:What is a polaris snowmobile owners favorite season?
A: Summer then they dont have to work on the sled

Politicians Suck.

I don’t know about you but I am sick and tired of my phone ringing from 9am to 9pm with political ads for politicians I have never even heard of.

Sunny day today, figures I have to work at 4pm at Dutches. Gogebic Lodge tomorrow and 3-5 inches of snow predicted which I am sure will happen because my plow truck is down. Happy Saturday everyone.

Fishing in a frozen lake It was a cold winter day. An old man walked out onto a frozen lake, cut a hole in the ice, dropped in his fishing line, and waited patiently for a bite. He was there for almost an hour, without even a nibble, when a young boy walked out onto the ice, cut a hole in the ice next to him. The young boy dropped his fishing line and minutes later he hooked a Largemouth Bass. The old man couldn’t believe his eyes but chalked it up to plain luck. Shortly thereafter, the young boy pulled in another large catch. The young boy kept catching fish after fish. Finally, the old man couldn’t take it any longer. “Son” he said, “I’ve been here for over an hour without even a nibble. You’ve been here only a few minutes and have caught a half dozen fish! How do you do it?” The boy responded, “Roo raf roo reep ra rums rrarm.” “What was that?” the old man asked. Again the boy responded, “Roo raf roo reep ra rums rarrm.” “Look,” said the old man, “I can’t understand a word you’re saying.” The boy spat the bait into his hand and said… “You have to keep the worms warm!”

Time to get the x-mas decorations out LOL. How sick is that. December 1st will be here before we know it. Becker, Mom on I will be on a plane to Wendover Nv to do a little gambling from Dec 1-4th with about 25 other people from the Hoop. Yes George is going too. So is Da Fish, I hope I don’t get caught up drinking with him though LOL Old Milwaukee and Crown Royal here we come.

Shout out to my future ex-father-inlaw, what do you want for Christmas Dave?

Santa comes down a chimney one Christmas Eve and to his surprise finds a gorgeous brunette waiting for him, wearing the sexiest lingerie imaginable.

“Santa,” she purrs, “Can you stay for a while?”

Santa says, “Ho, ho ho! I’ve gotta go! Have to deliver toys to children, you know!”

She comes close, starts playing with his beard, whispers in his ear, “Santa, don’t you have a gift you would like to give me?”

Santa says, “Ho, ho, ho! I’ve gotta go! Have to spread Christmas cheer, you know!”

The brunette takes off her straps, giving Santa a view of her breasts and says, “Santa, are you sure there’s no gift you’d like to leave?”

Santa says, “Hey hey hey, might as well stay. I can’t get up the chimney this way!”

Happy November.

30 more days until the snowmobile trails open up. Hip Hip Hooray. Halloween was a bust only 1 trick or treater. But I get to eat the left over candy. So maybe it was not a bust. We had to put Mom’s dog to sleep yesterday. Sad day but Bucko was old and he looked pretty miserable. Mom took it better than I did, but I guess when you are 84 years old you seen it all. It sucks when you see everyone dying off before you , she told me that Bucko was the 4th dog she had to put to sleep and this is the first time she didn’t have to go alone. Moms are tough.

Gloomy Halloween.

A gloomy night for the Halloweeniers. Well gloomy day anyway. When I was a kid we went at night, there was snow on the ground and that was in Duluth Mn. I remember Mom going through our bags taking out the fruit because of rumors of razor blades and Dad taking all the snickers bars because they were “bad” for us.

Brett: What do mummies like listening to on Halloween?
Brent: I don’t know.
Brett: Wrap music!